The Dog Who Refused to Sit: Listening to What Your Dog Isn’t Saying

Grover is a scruffy little black and white terrier Hope met this week at the doggy day care where she’s trainer-in-residence once a week. The staff brings questions, asks advice, and gets her outside perspective on the canine conundrums they deal with daily.

This little guy really had the staff puzzled. A young, active pup, Grover plays with the other dogs beautifully—jumping around, wrestling, and having a blast. He loves people, dogs, and the world in general. While he can be a bit reserved at first, he warms up right away. He was adopted a few months ago from a reputable rescue and sounds like the absolute perfect dog.

Except for one little quirk they couldn’t figure out: Grover won’t sit.

But Every Dog Sits... Right?

Almost every pet dog on the planet knows “Sit!” It’s the first cue most people teach, and probably the one used most. Since most dogs default to sitting anyway, training it is usually just a matter of capturing the movement or luring it.

Not Grover. He not only doesn’t know it, but tried-and-true luring methods don't work.

Normally, you hold a treat right at the dog’s nose and move it slowly back over their head toward their tail. As the head goes up and back, the butt goes down. Easy peasy.

Grover won’t sit. If you hold the treat slightly too high, he pops right onto his back legs to reach for it. If you back him into a corner to keep him in place, he just stands there looking at you with big puppy-dog eyes. Uh-uh. No way. Don’t wanna. Not gonna.

Sifting Through Reasons

It was puzzling. Hope had rarely met a dog who so adamantly refused a standard posture. At this point, many people might be tempted to push down on his hindquarters to force the position.

To be perfectly honest, the thought crossed Hope’s mind. But sanity and good training principles prevailed. If a dog is that firm about not doing something, there is almost always a valid reason.

Grover was chilling near Hope while she pondered the problem. Naturally, with a friendly dog close by, she reached out for some long, relaxing shoulder-to-tail strokes.

That’s when Hope felt the clue right under her fingertips. Grover’s five-inch tail was kinked in two distinct places, abruptly changing direction at 90-degree angles. It had clearly been broken in the past and never set properly, ending in a blunt, old amputation.

With this new clue, the pieces came together. Before his rescue, Grover had likely suffered a severe injury—perhaps being hit by a car. While he walks and runs comfortably now, those old kinked vertebrae suggest underlying skeletal issues or stiffness that make a full fold into a sit uncomfortable.

The solution was simple: Stop asking Grover to sit. Standing or down-stay works just as well. Recognizing when to drop a cue is just as important as knowing how to teach one.

Reading The Room

Sometimes, a dog's reluctance isn't about physical discomfort—it's simply about how you ask.

Another day care resident Hope met was Ginger. Ginger hated having her paws touched, to the point of growling and curling her lip. Staffer Maggie was worried Ginger would have to miss out on the upcoming doggy art project: painting fall "paw flowers" for the owners.

Ginger turned out to be a quick study. Hope started with a fast game of "Target!", specifically rewarding Ginger whenever she chose to use her paw.

Once Hope confirmed Ginger was comfortable initiating movement with her paws, the next step was seeing if she’d allow a consensual touch.

Ginger is a big, powerful dog, so reaching out to grab a paw was out of the question. Instead, they played a variation of the viral "Paws In" game. Everyone placed their hands together in the center and invited Ginger to place her paw on top of the stack.

Ginger did it on the very first try—no hesitation, no growls.

From there, transitioning to "High Five" and "Gimme Your Paw" was effortless.

It turns out Ginger wasn't being difficult; she just preferred being invited rather than grabbed. She’ll happily give you her paw if you ask nicely—a lesson a lot of us could stand to remember!